Earlier today I had a call from a good friend. A wonderful woman. A strong woman. A wise woman. A woman that has her sh*t together. Great I hear you say, except, was it?
Basically, she was calling because she was feeling down and had a couple of encounters in recent days with family and friends that had left her feeling bad. We had a long conversation where she explained how they had behaved. Long story short, we eventually got to the point where we established the real reason she was feeling bad had nothing to do with ‘their’ behaviour. She was feeling awful actually. Why? Because she was feeling that she had let them use and abuse her. She was feeling bad because ‘SHE had let them’ use her.
The Basic Truth
The basic truth is that for most women, myself included, we have these impossibly high standards for ourselves. We expect ourselves to be good, kind and loving human beings – forgiving and all things beautiful. Yet at the same time and in direct contradiction to this statement, we also expect ourselves not to make mistakes and be superwoman at all times – not to throw ‘dicky-fits’ as I call them, or have tempers. Allow me to explain using the example of my conversation with my friend.
She was feeling bad because subconsciously she was losing respect for herself, for allowing herself to be used and treated badly – yet again. The other people had said sorry, but this scenario had played over time and time again over the years. At the same time if she had just walked away, she would then have felt guilty for not being forgiving when the other people said sorry. So here she was, unable to win, against her own standards.
It turns out that most of us women are truly wonderful friends and can show compassion and forgiveness, and true friendship for others. Just like I did in this call. We behave as wonderful best friends do. Yet to ourselves we behave like the horrible, impossible taskmaster that beats us up non-stop for the most humane of behaviours.
The point I’m making is simple. I’m asking you a question: Are you your own worst taskmaster or are you your own best friend? Be honest. Sometimes it takes someone else to show us that we are being unkind, unforgiving and impossible with ourselves. Sometimes it takes someone else to point out that if you are treating yourself badly, then how can you possibly expect others to treat you well. After all the others learn how to treat you by watching how you behave with you right. We lead by example. So how are you treating yourself?
Well, we in The Power of The Goddess Team are very excited as in only a few days time we are all off to beautiful Paestum in Italy for The Fall Retreat 2016. It’s going to be a truly wonderful 5 days of recalibrating this very muscle – the one that is called either ‘being your own worst enemy’ or ‘being your own best friend’. It’s not too late to join us if you are having a massive aha moment – give us a call or contact us via the direct message on our Facebook page. And if you can’t join us in Italy then you’ll definitely want to join us for The Fall Retreat 2017 – look out for the details which will be posted very soon.
In the meantime, I send out a plea to you to be your own best friend. What does this mean? Treat yourself as you do those that are nearest and dearest to you. Treat yourself as you treat those that you love – your children, your partner, your best friends, your mother and father. Notice how that brings the best out in them. Consider how you could bring the best out in yourself just by being kinder to yourself. The first step in being this way with yourself is to remind yourself that you are human and not a robot or super-human-being, and to forgive yourself all the things that you have held against yourself.
So go into this new day with a new you, a better you, a you that is better because you are your own best friend.
Signing off by sending you love, and wondering about how you may have been unkind to yourself in the past, and how you may now be nicer to you- do share. Remember in sharing your stories you may help someone else who is struggling so please share in the comments below or on our Facebook Page. Also when you like our blogs we know what you want more of, so please let us know by liking, or better still share this post and help someone else shift their world today 🙂